I realized quite suddenly today, that every relationship I have ever been in, was the result of my initiative.
That is to say, I have never been properly wooed.
Which leads me to wondering.
What would happen if this time I didn’t chase after anyone? What if this time I gave myself permission to wait and see if someone chooses me, just as I am.
Someone right. Someone good.
Someone who thinks I am worth the effort of wooing.
I am tired of being with men who cannot decide if I am what they really want.
I want him to choose me.
I like me, she makes me happy. Now, for the first time in my life I am content to let my fate find me and decide if I am what he (the man I haven’t met yet) wants.
I’m not in a hurry. I just want to be someone’s first pick. Someone’s true choice. Instead of falling into love because I was readily there for the tumbling, I want a guy to want me enough to put in the work.
I’m choosing me. I choose me because he deserves the best of himself and the best of me.
