Pluto in the 12th house, you like ferreting out secrets. The unconscious, the mysterious and the taboo. Occult topics delight your wicked little heart endlessly.
You are extremely perceptive and this makes you very open to investigating secrets and intrigues that might have a darker edge to them. Your subconscious thoughts and emotions are complex. Sometimes not even you understand why you view or feel about things the way you do. There is this underlying vibe that you tap into that just feels…connected to something bigger, deeper and sometimes, more transforming.
You have unfortunately suffered in life and these sufferings lead you to an understanding of darker truths others might only guess at. These experiences forged a new you each time they happened and, as a result, you see truths and secrets more clearly than others.
You know that the bad exists and because of this, you look square into the eyes of topics others shy away from even acknowledging.
Death creates deep problems in your life. It makes you doubt yourself and question why these dark things happened to you.
Sometimes it feels like it’s personal. Just when you were getting settled in and contented, death comes along and breaks parts of you off. This can result in a repression of emotions as a means of controlling deaths impact.
Distancing yourself from things as a reflex to the fear of losing someone. This might work to make you feel more in control but, it also leaves you feeling a lack of anchor and intimacy in your life. How much is disconnecting worth in the end, if you lose connection with your own soul and its happiness? Can you truly call that living?
You might even repress your needs which can approach out of your more shadow side. You might suffer from depression or take on addictive behaviours that trap you in a cycle of emotional trauma whereby you feel you cannot escape.
The solution is to pull those dark thoughts and feeling out and think them over. Ask questions and be truthful about your answers. Only by letting yourself feel your pain will you release your loss and hurt from your heart. These hauntings and ghosts that leave you feeling lost and forlorn can only be cleansed by learning to trust yourself again. To accept and love even those parts of you that are not shiny and pretty. Even scars have their value.
Healing can only come when you stop keeping yourself distracted and start listening to what your inner voice wants to say to you.