For some people, love means the expectation of you doing what “they” want and in return they will love “you”. For others, love means the expectation of doing everything “you” want because they hope that by doing so, you will love “them”.
My idea of love is much more radical than that. My expectation is to love myself and in accomplishing this, knowing how to go about loving you.
It is by loving ourselves that we understand the truth. Love isn’t about self indulgence, it’s about forgiveness and acceptance of all that is and all that isn’t.
Truly loving yourself isn’t about giving in to a selfish temptation. It isn’t about obtaining proof of affection. It isn’t about power or ego.
It’s about finding all the weakness, darkness, and flaw, and allowing ourselves to love those parts too. To compassionately forgive and enjoy that which we are, instead of wishing to be all that we are not. To challenge ourselves and to witness our truths. It’s about gathering our deepest pain and letting it transform us.
The greatest love comes from being deeply compassionate towards ourselves and thus, learning to truly find the serenity in accepting from others what we have finally learned how to accept from ourselves.
We learn to unashamedly offer love, not because we have an expectation of being loved in return, we offer it because we know that we are worthy of it. By loving ourselves we learn what love looks like. We have seen what it looks like reflected every morning in our own mirror.
I will love you as the sun loves light. As the dark loves shadows. As I love and embrace myself, I am teaching my heart the ways of loving and embracing you. This, is the truest path to accepting and receiving love.
No, this love isn’t about ignoring bad treatment or letting others hurt us. What I am saying, is that if we love ourselves truly, we will not accept less than we deserve from others, just as we will have learned not to accept less than this from ourselves.