Rarity

Your kindness is a kind of elegance gently folded into the silver refinement of your smile.

My curiosity stands startled,

by the intricate layers of your pattern.

From the simplicity that is your inner soul,

to the sexy curves of your complex humor, like starlight, peeking out.

Oh yes, you are definitely a compliment of some solemn and reverent divinity long forgotten and completely unexpected, the way a miracle is unexpected.

Within your fragile soul, there lies something cherished and sacred.

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B.

Shay visit. Plotting.

Shay is staying with me for 2 days next weekend! We are plotting our visit. We’ve already decided we want to see a movie, go for a long bike path walk, order in from Eat Street, and possibly get me a haircut (trust me.. it’s needed)

My biggest concern is making sure my apartment is nice and that I have food in.

Hmm..

Better make a grocery list. ::Scribbles::

Need to clean every surface in my apartment. It must be CLEAN!

Vaccum. Dust, Arrange and Plump. ::Huff huff huff:::

I might be getting a teensy bit manic about making my place nice.

::Bites nails::

Tomorrow is going to be an epic cleaning stress day. I might have some issues with always worrying people will not like my apartment if it isn’t 100% perfect.

I might just clean myself into a coma or something. Please check on me if you smell Windex and hear screaming.

Capricorn secret #3

Socially, I am a car crash, a traffic stop AND a bag of freaked out inner dialog wanting to go home and eat a pint of ice cream, rolled into one conveniently awkward package. If we don’t know each other much I’ll probably be attempting to avoid #1 saying something geeky (in case you don’t get the reference to a show, game or fad I only started vibing to 20 years after everyone has already seen it, played it, or remembers it) #2 being overly sarcastic (because you might not realize it’s sarcasm) #3 letting on in any way, shape or form that I actually really, really, reeeaaally want you to pick me as a friend.. because, we Cappies don’t really have that many…ok, maybe 2 or 3..but, we wish we had more…and we kinda cry and get upset about it.. sometimes…but alone in our room.. cause OMG! Don’t ever let anyone see or know we cry or we will just DIE!

In truth, Capricorns are secretly shy with a huge stone-face facade firmly in place until we know you actually want us as friends…and then, and only then, do we relax enough to be our true goofy selves.

Capricorn secret #2

If I like you, I’ll kill myself trying to hide it from you, myself, and every soul ever born, amen. I’ll pretend I don’t even know you exist. I’ll deny it like 10,000 red-hot needles are poised under my fingertips.

However, if I realize I Love you, I’ll see no reason to lie about it..in fact, I’ll dare you to say I don’t love you! Cause, bitch! It took me this long to stop running from the fact I even liked you! You think I’m lying after I exhausted myself running from it? You crazy.

Ps. We are never, ever, never gonna admit we have imaginary conversations with you…not ever…

but, yup..yup and hahaha yup.

Capricorn secret #1

I might appear cold and slightly sarcastic most of the time (and I kinda am) but, I’m also the bitch going to kick anyone who hurts you in the balls until they can’t walk straight because I know you are just a soft-hearted idiot who hasn’t learned to be cold and sarcastic yet and, honestly, It makes me super protective of you for being braver than me. (Ps..that cold sarcastic side has a brother…but, you gotta earn the chance to meet my goofy, giggly completely smooshy other half)

I have to take the world news in small bites. It’s not that I’m surprised or shocked by the changes in humanity, it’s that I’m not surprised or even slightly astonished anymore by the lengths they are willing to go in order to keep the paradigms from shifting away from wealth, classism, and obnoxious privilege, into a community of humane growth, intellectual curiosity and beauty.

I saw the advent of apathy coming years ago. What I am is terribly disappointed. Disappointed that people accept these things are happening, so long as they aren’t happening to them. So long as it suits an agenda that benefits their personal beliefs and goals, no matter cost to others. The fact that rape culture exists, genocide exists, controlling people’s bodies, making laws to prop up and maintain a dying infastructure that was never for ALL people, just SOME of the people. It makes me angry and tired. It keeps me in a constant state of despair and disbelief.

I can’t fathom a people who wake and decide that these entitled views and oppressive actions are the things they will support, these are the people they will champion, these are the laws they want to see.

A truly humane person cannot fathom cruelty or the acceptance of cruelty to anyone. It makes me feel physically numb and horrified to realize that large portions of the human world are ok with hurting others or limiting their happiness, just so they, themselves, can continue with the life they have become accustomed to living.

Our planet is destroying itself inwardly and outwardly. Man created a god of money and power and now they are not only its slave, they are cheering as it destroys them.